aiya...today is really #$%*! lor. haiz.. not I dun want to go mah. In the end take 183 missed the stop to change bus and ended in jurong east. Then took 143, still cannot find the whatever bus stop, and ended up in chinatown. What is this lor... I left work at 6.10pm...then at 8pm I passed by science park 2 again. Defeated. Felt so scared, caustrophobic and wondering why the heck did I want to go in the first place lor.
Then later.... msg sean he din reply. still like dumb one lidat, walk one big round over the PA... to bridge to go to stadium, I already knew only 50% chances of meeting...'coz I dun even know where the kallang squash centre is...shuan le... better dun give 'coz the card itself is also crap...chocolate store in fridge at work in the end leh? melt le... in the end walk through such a dark area frighten myself to death...then finally saw the squah courts...still got ppl inside...thought was him then wanted to hide in some corner then in the end he was walking from the end of that corner....he saw me but wasn't really surprised and just asked me why I was here... like I really knew....I also duno what rationality and state of mind I was in....Maybe just want to get things right for once, maybe is 'coz I want to tell him I really care about him now in this critical period. Whatever.
Really whatever. 'coz in the end he might be forfeiting the tournament here to go Hong Kong. Then why I write the card lor....defeats the whole purpose man.
Diluted...dilute all the hopes. all the encouragement that was wanting to give him.
haha. What was I honestly doing today?
charon